I need help with my divorce

Divorce is a very complex situation and nobody should get through it alone. Divorce community The other advice I would give is don’t fight to stay in the family home. While you may feel attached now, that home represents a time of your life that has now ended. Living with those memories could be harder than you think. What’s more, when you meet someone new, they may not want to live in a home that represents your past marriage, either.

It will help if you try to keep things as normal as possible in your life. Do not skip meals or change sleeping habits. Positive routines like using your to-do list and calendar will help you keep focus. Exercise is always a great way to relieve stress. Try not to isolate yourself from your friends. Try to maintain a positive outlook and do not let yourself be lured into needless conflicts with your spouse. You will need his signature on a settlement agreement before your divorce is over. You will still be parents together for years after the divorce. Take it one day at a time. Focus on the present and not the past. Try to control only those things within your control. Many things in a divorce are outside of your control but you cannot blow those things out of proportion. Make a plan and work on it. That is how you will take control of your divorce and not let it take control of you.

The best divorce advice I ever received was, “Don’t get even, get better!” Instead of directing negative energy toward your ex, generate that power toward bettering yourself. When my ex-husband and I separated and divorced, I returned to graduate school and finished my doctorate degree. I used all of my energy to empower myself toward complete self-reliance and independence. That is the very best place from which to enter your next relationship. If you are the one wanting the divorce, get all financial records copied before your mate is aware so there’s no vanishing money once you file the papers. And copy everything that could have an impact on the outcome — from checkbooks to bank statements to investment accounts. It’s much easier to avoid the “he said, she said” arguments with proof in your hands! And if at all possible, agree to use a mediator. You will save thousands of bucks but it will only work if you’re both game.

This is a very bad idea for two reasons. First, except in extremely egregious cases, most courts won’t punish your spouse financially for being a bad person. Second, hiring an attorney to punish your spouse will cost you because your attorney will need to increase the number of hours spent on your case. Increased attorney hours means higher divorce costs, and higher divorce costs means there will be fewer assets and cash left for you and your family. Try to take the emotion out of your divorce, and treat your case as a business arrangement. The best revenge is to live well after the divorce is over.

I created DreamsRecycled after my own divorce, to help both men and women like me through their journey. My story is unique as I literally dreamt of the idea in the middle of my own stressful divorce proceedings. What started as the only marketplace specializing in divorce, quickly grew to become the premier one stop resource for all your before, during and after divorce needs. See extra info at Divorce community.